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23 March 2011 @ 03:53 pm
unlocking insights  
I feel like, in life, I go through phases of learning and growing. I'll discover and "unlock" a new skill or insight, and then I'll take a year or two or three (or more!) integrating it and bringing it into my regular practice. And along the way, I'll be discovering and unlocking others, of course, but it often feels like there's on particular theme to all the little skills and insights I'm growing into.

This year, my biggie is being compassionate with myself. This one is huge, and spills out into pretty much everything else. It means I cut myself slack where I previously didn't, and that I let my feelings count as much as my intellect when they're not in agreement. It means that often when I'm trying to figure out what the "right" thing to do is in a tough situation, the question I ask myself is, "What advice would I give a friend in my position?" because I am so often more compassionate with my friends than I am with myself.

What life lessons have you recently unlocked?
I'm feeling: chipperchipper
Madame Blue aka Pygmentsweetmmeblue on March 23rd, 2011 11:05 pm (UTC)
Slow down. Most things that you feel the need to react to NOW do not need to be reacted to NOW. It's not always a crisis.

Oh, and while you are waiting, think, look how you are feeling, process it, then react.

Edited at 2011-03-23 11:05 pm (UTC)
TWPyouvebeenpixied on March 23rd, 2011 11:52 pm (UTC)
There are more beautiful humans in the world than I ever knew. Sometimes, I don't even have to go looking for them.
Kcatkcatalyst on March 24th, 2011 01:26 am (UTC)
It's a marathon, not a sprint.
lazyzlazyz on March 24th, 2011 03:54 am (UTC)
Is it ever.
Sapere Aude: swordprimal_pastry on March 24th, 2011 02:20 am (UTC)
That being a friend doesn't have to cause me pain to be worth doing.

That being compassionate with myself isn't weakness but builds strength.

That there is a way to be transparent while still honoring my goals and boundaries.

existential hot showerveek on March 24th, 2011 11:07 am (UTC)
Actually, compassion for myself is my big one too. Perhaps unsurprisingly.

Also, that my courage and my selfishness are not the same thing, though they often feel the same to me.
blkblk on March 24th, 2011 01:28 pm (UTC)
That my view of my parents from my childhood memories is probably jsut as skewed as my children's view of me is.
DancingWolfGrrldancingwolfgrrl on March 24th, 2011 02:54 pm (UTC)
When I get tripped up by my patterns, I sometimes say it's like falling down a hole. It turns out that falling down a hole does not actually get any easier, no matter how many times you do it or how excellent you get at avoiding 95% of the falls. It does, however, get easier to get out of the hole, and so even though the fall still sucks, it turns out I don't need to worry about it as much.
drwexdrwex on March 24th, 2011 07:00 pm (UTC)
Gamer geeks
call this sort of thing "leveling up." I don't think I've leveled up much myself, recently. I've done more in the way of applying lessons learned in the past to new situations that seemed to call for those lessons.
Mizarchivist: Mirrormaskmizarchivist on March 24th, 2011 08:36 pm (UTC)
I'm still integrating adapting to situations out of my control. My entire life seems to be this right now.
Molotov Coqtiz: for youeestiplika on April 2nd, 2011 12:47 am (UTC)
So many, sometimes daily.

Most recently, i have begun to understand that my heart, it is resilient. At least metaphorically speaking.