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ruthless compassion
12 April 2003 @ 11:13 pm
Life is feeling kinda crazy these days. I'm having a hard time being motivated for Mosaic stuff. It's all feeling really overwhelming at the moment, what with losing the land in Stow, and now moving forward on land in Harvard. Knowing that I'm going to be in Guatemala in the fall makes it difficult to focus my energy on something that's already difficult mentally. We have a couple of weeks of fewer meetings coming up, and I'm guiltily thrilled about it.

Mosaic is also really needing people to do more these days, and when people don't, I want to pick it up, but now is really not the time for me to do that. Tricky.

For the first time in a long time, I have a (well, several) potentially complicated romantic entanglements, which is/are both exciting and draining to consider.

Even my email is out of control! My inbox just balloons and balloons, until I have 100 messages I'm meaning to respond to, and by then half of them are out-of-date, and I'm still not enthusiastic about dealing with the ones that are still relevant... *sigh*

On the other hand, I've had some really fabulous time with friends and loves in the past couple of weeks, and I'm really liking my life, in an overall sense, even if the details are a little overwhelming at the moment. ghislaine made me a tasty breakfast this morning, and we had a date that was just mellow and lovely and good. I have a lot of people in my life right now who feel like good fits to my different edges (and some with whom there's friction, of course).

Well, life is funny. I'm feeling centered in myself, but in some kind of flux. I'm sure it'll come clear to me eventually...
 
 
I'm feeling: mixed