I don't care about baseball.
To take that a step further, I really don't care about sports, in general. It's fun to get behind a team, but I just never developed the skill of keeping track of such things, and it's mostly interesting from a sociological point of view.
That said, I have an even more dangerous confession to make:
I don't want the Red Sox to win tonight.
Wait! Wait! Before you tar and feather me, hear me out:
It seems to me that the essence of the interest of sports is the edge-of-your-seat, nail-biting tension, and we really haven't had any of that in the last three games. After all these years of seeing them come so close and then blow it, where's the fun in seeing the Sox sweep the series? I want some drama and excitement! I want it to come down to the bottom of the 9th in game 7, bases loaded, make-it-or-break-it, hold-your-breath excitement.
I don't really care who wins the series. Sure, it would be nice to see the Sox win, and we all know they psych themselves out enough that it could be a good long time before they get here again, but it's supposed to be dramatic and interesting, not just, "Oh, whee, that was a breeze." I'd like all of my friends who are Sox fans to be able to jump around, scream, shout, and go to work the next day with a hoarse throat, sure, but why tonight rather than Sunday? And if they're going to win, shouldn't they do it at home, thus rewarding all of their loyal fans with a last heart-stopping game before they stop being everyone's favorite losers, and turn into just your average team who wins some and loses some?
Whew. I'm glad I got that off my chest. And before anyone comes by to wrap my porch in toilet paper or graffiti the house with charming slogans, remember that the house is owned by completely optimistic Sox fans who don't agree with me for a second :)