ruthless compassion (aroraborealis) wrote,
ruthless compassion

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In college, I had a very tight group of friends. Most of us lived in the same dorm our freshman year and became friends that way, though we had some add-ons from other entries and other years. I wouldn't say I had a best friend in this circle, and dynamics shifted around over the years, but one of the fairly steady subgroups was Kristin, Josh, Scott and myself. Kristin and Josh started dating mere minutes after arriving on campus, and Scott lived next door to Josh our first year. I don't think our foursome really clicked as a foursome until our second year, but as we were all skiers, that encouraged us to spend time together. (Okay, Kristin wasn't really a skier, yet, but she was dating a skier and so it was inevitable that she was on the road to ruin skiingness.)

For several years, the four of us took trips out west to ski in the winter. The first three trips, we went to Denver, stayed with Scott's folks, and skied in Summit County. The next year, we went to Alta, and the year after that, Whistler. I think these trips, and others that we did together, solidified our friendships (and our relationships with each others' families, where we were all welcomed like adopted kids into the families). When we graduated, we all moved to the Boston area. Now, I'm the only one of us left here, and I'm not as good about being in touch as I wish I were, but these are people who I think of as the kind of friends I could call up after not talking for 6 months and say, "Hey, I need your help," and have them move mountains to help me, which is pretty damn special.

Kristin and Josh finally got married a couple of years ago and moved to Philly. Scott finished his MBA at Sloan a year or so ago and moved to Seattle with his new girlfriend, Margot. I met Margot about a year and a half ago at dinner with Kristin and Josh in Philadelphia when Scott and Margot stopped by on their way to NYC from I-don't-remember-where. It was a fun dinner, made more so by the obvious good fit between Scott and Margot. Of all the men I knew in college, Scott was probably the one who was most clearly on track for marriage and kids (though not in a hurry) but had been thwarted in a number of his relationships in heading to that goal. Even in that brief dinner, it was glaringly obvious that Scott and Margot were in it for the long haul, and that they were thrilled with this fact.

The whole weekend was well-planned, which, I suppose, is important if you're doing a destination wedding. There were enough activities to keep people occupied but not so many as to be overwhelming. I got some time by the pool with the groom on Friday afternoon, along with some of his Seattle friends, all of whom were fun and friendly. I roomed with Josh and Kristin and had a great time catching up with them after a long summer out of touch.

It was probably the most expensive, per-head, wedding that I've ever attended. It may be the most expensive overall, too, though I kind of like to think the 300-person big catholic affair beat out this 85-person one. What do you expect, after all, of a wedding in Aspen? Apparently, the MOB submitted their wedding announcement to the New York Times, and was bitterly disappointed that it wasn't run, so that may tell us something about this particular set.

Saturday, there was a farmer's market in town, which was great fun, and had some good snacks for back at the ranch condo. I'm used to everyone in the west having a dog, and Aspen was no exception. I'm not used to every dog in town being a purebred variety with its hair done, though, and this is one way that Aspen is still snootier than Jackson Hole (thank goodness). I swear, every other person had a dog, and I didn't see a single mutt the whole morning. It was the weirdest thing.

After a picnic in the room, Josh went off to be a groomsman, and Kristin and I went to the hottub. Lovely.

In the evening, we got fancied up and took the bus up to the lodge where the wedding would take place. We were herded down to the extremely picturesque patio and treated to a very nice wedding ceremony, complete with rustic chuppah and progressive wedding facilitator. The bride and groom ran the ceremony, with the celebrant/facilitator piping up with a couple of comments here and there. It was very, very nice. The father of the groom cried. The groom cried. The mother of the bride cried. The bride... held it together. It was great.

Then, there was a period of socializing while photos were taken, and there was a lot of competition for appetizers. Fortunately, many of the guests were moving slowly due to the 10,000' altitude, so we managed to get a few of the tasties, despite being out of the natural flow of the waitstaff with trays. Pontus, a friendly fellow from the Swedish contingent, was good at flagging down the people with trays so we could snag nibbles.

Dinner was great, of course, and led to some of my favorite moments outside the ceremony: the toasts. Everyone gave great toasts. I was sorry there weren't more scheduled. It was clear that the mother of the bride had everything very carefully planned, so impromptu toasts weren't part of the deal, which was really a shame. The quality of friends that Scott and Margot have, I think, would have made for some really fabulous toasts.

Rather than a DJ, they had a band, playing swing tunes. I love swing! But not many people our age know how to do it. Had I known, though, that there would be swing, I'd've brought dbang as my date.

Sunday, we had a delicious brunch, involving as much smoked salmon as you can shake a stick at (and in my case, that's a lot) and some delicious pastries. Unsurprisingly, really, the food throughout the weekend was killer. I still have some of the tasty goat cheese I got at the market on Saturday, but, sadly, we have no crusty bread on which to eat it.

So, I'm now the last of our foursome (though not, by far, the last of the larger circle) not to be married. Josh and Kristin cheated by marrying each other, but even so. It was also the first time I've been to a wedding where most of the people my age were married, which has partially to do with the particular crowd at the wedding, but also, I think, it's something of a milestone in life, and one that I'm pondering a bit in the back of my head. More on that, perhaps, later.

All in all, it was such fun, and, besides, I do love mountain summer weather. I had the redeye back to Boston last night, arriving this morning slightly after 5am. I sprang for a cab and was in bed, delightedly, by 6am. I slept until about 10:30 and now all I have to do is stay awake until 10ish so as to keep my body clock from going completely haywire.
Tags: williams

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